Leadership
Someone recently asked me to define what leadership means to me… I was a little taken back by the question, you don’t really define leadership, your kind of just know what it means. So, when you are asked to define it makes you think a bit more.
I defined leadership as an ever-evolving quality but a set type of attributes. The clarification question was asked, “If I had to state it in front of my volunteers/ in a one-word sentence what would I say?” my answer, “Leadership is the ability to grow others to their potential all while challenging them to become a better version of themselves.
I wanted to give you a couple of practical yet effective ways to lead. This is what I have learned in my few years in ministry and in coaching.
- Creating the team; aka “The Family”
I believe this is one of the hardest parts of leadership. You have to make ask for someone to be on your team. This means asking someone to add another thing to their plate. But what you might not know is that a person may be looking for something more valuable in their life. They may be waiting for a challenge or even more simple than that they may just need to have someone see the value in what they can accomplish.
I have always been taught that in ministry your story is the most powerful. So, ask yourself what got you serving in ministry? Why do you serve? What is the value of serving in ministry? Once you explore all those questions use them to your advantage! Tell the person you are asking to step up why all that matters to you and they will possibly have more buy-in when they will understand your perspective and your heart. Now, I will be honest I still struggle to make the ask with this a bit but I have learned if you don’t ask then you have to do it all yourself.
Once you make the ask, create that family dynamic. I honestly call my volunteer team my second family. They really are, we teach, lead and grow kids just like a family. But we also struggled together, grown together, and learn together. We have been able to be there for each other in the hard times because we have opened ourselves up to the ministry but also the “family”.
2. Ownership
I believe this the most important part of leadership!
Creating ownership in leaders is leading others to their own potential in where they feel comfortable using their own leadership style to effect change in others.
Once you have them on board it is now your job to train and challenge them. We start with training (do not challenge someone right off the bat, I promise you will scare them away!).
Train them in how you as a leader lead but make it apply to their leadership style. I have personally tried to sit down with every one of my volunteers. Not just all together for a yearly training but one on one coffee. I need to learn about them, I need to know what they are good at, what is hard for them, and what are they passionate about. Learning who they are will not only allow you to know what they will most likely succeed at but also, they will feel they are more valued by you.
As you build up your repour with them allow them to have ownership. Let them lead in how you know they can lead. Let me take the reins, allow them to use their talents in their own way.
In my ministry, I told them that I will have the small group lesson ready for them if they need it, but this is your group of kids, you know what they like and don’t like. You know when they need to move around. The small group is there if you need it but “I trust you” to do what you think will get them involved or just talking.
The “I trust you” piece is soo important. Trust your volunteers! If you have done the proper thing to train and teach them, hand over the reins. They will lead in the way you taught them to but with ownership.
Also giving your volunteers ownership won’t micromanage them, it will free you up with more time and it will get them to be sold out for your ministry. To me, those are all huge wins!
3. Asking more of your leaders. (it’s okay I promise)
It’s simple, some want more responsibility than others. Figure out who those people are on your team and ask more of them.
You should feel comfortable making that big ask because you build those relationships.
The time that you spend developing who they are and giving them the ownership will cause them to feel more comfortable when you make those ask.
If you ask more of your leaders, then in return they will feel more valued and honored. You are giving them more responsibly in your own area, you feel comfortable enough and trust them enough to say, “I need you to step up.” If you have done your due diligence, they probably will not say no and start to jump headfirst into whatever you ask of them.
4. Leading by example
We hear this all the time in leadership, you should lead by example. The people you are leading will only do what you are willing to do yourself...Well, I am here to tell you THIS IS TRUE!
As a leader but also someone who is led by others. I constantly looking to my superiors in what they are doing and how they are leading. Any time there is a major ask of me or just a task given to me, I look to my leadership. I am asking myself… Did the leader ever do this themselves? Can they help me through the tough spots? Will they know the challenges I will face? Also, would they or have they been willing to do this themselves? If so, why? If not, why not? If I can’t or do not have answers to any of those questions, I am most likely to get frustrated at my leadership.
Ask yourself this; why would you ask anyone to do something you are not willing to do yourself? Are you too good for that? Does the job suck? Is it too hard or frustrating? Is it too messy? If you would say yes to any of these phrases and not do it yourself why would you ask someone to do it for you? As a leader, you are supposed to teach and take others along with you. If you are a leader you LEAD through it and in it all. People will follow if you know you are willing to lead by example.
Now leadership isn’t all glory and hype. There is a cost in leadership.
Time. Effort. Money. Struggles. Hardship. Relationship. Growth.
Just to name a few...
Burn out is a huge one; It’s because one leaders are either trying to do it all themselves, or two they are won’t take a break.
But there are ways to help not get burned out in leadership;
- Find your people, use them! They could be friends, leadership, your spouse, and/ or your volunteers.
- Take a break! When is your next vacation or your next retreat? Are you giving yourself a weekend or are you continued to lead on “days off”?
You need to take care of yourself so that you are able to lead others. You need people! They need you!
You can only lead at the capacity that you let yourself lead. So, give yourself a break, a refresh, a recharge with your people so that you are able to lead those that follow you!
Another cost in leadership; is how do you want to spend your leadership?
This might sound weird, but you only have so much time and energy to give everyone. Who are you willing to spend it with? You need to figure out where is it best to spend your time and energy? Who needs it more; Your spouse versus your volunteer? The person you are mentoring versus a new leader. You have to figure out who you leave behind, and you have to be okay with that.
No one talks about this cost, but it is the hardest. And the people that you are “leaving behind” won’t get it.
Here is my advice, if they don’t fit into where you are trying to take your company, your ministry, your friendship, or even your life goals. They are not someone to spend your energy on. It sounds harsh but why waste your abilities on someone who is just draining to you!
Most of my examples were ministry related, but all this can be used in any leadership context.
So, What do you say your greatest success but also challenges in leadership? What do you personally need to work to be a more successful leader? Do you have any other advice about leadership?
Put it below in the comments, share your leadership knowledge with others!
